My girlfriend is pregnant and I don't want children, how should I tell her how I feel?

Updated on : January 20, 2022 by Isaac Smith



My girlfriend is pregnant and I don't want children, how should I tell her how I feel?

Yes, tell him how you feel and make him understand that you are not ready to be a father.

Four months earlier, even I was in the same situation where I don't want to become a father at the time ... we were looking for many solutions to abort the pregnancy ... one of the easiest ways is to use emergency contraception. But we are late, emergency contraception is used within 12-24 hours after intercouse. So we started looking for the other options available ... we don't want to go to the gynecologist.

Instead, we try to abort the pregnancy at home. At that time I came to know about the abortion pil

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Yes, tell him how you feel and make him understand that you are not ready to be a father.

Four months earlier, even I was in the same situation where I don't want to become a father at the time ... we were looking for many solutions to abort the pregnancy ... one of the easiest ways is to use emergency contraception. But we are late, emergency contraception is used within 12-24 hours after intercouse. So we started looking for the other options available ... we don't want to go to the gynecologist.

Instead, we try to abort the pregnancy at home. At that time I found out about the abortion pill which is ... "Mifepristone (also known as Ru 486) and misoprostol". These pill combinations are 95% effective if the pregnancy is only less than “9 weeks”. The combination consists of 1 mifepristone and 4 misoprostol pills. First, after eating something, you should take mifepristone first. Later, between 24 and 48 hours, a combination (2 misoprostol) should be taken orally or vaginally. Again, within 4 hours, the other set of misoprostol (last 2 pills) should be taken.

When mifepristone is taken ... the pill will block the hormone (progesterone) that is used to develop a baby inside the uterus, if the hormone is blocked, the baby will detach from the uterus. After those 24 hours, at least one person should be with the woman after taking misoprostol because, as soon as the misoprostol pill is swallowed ... the abortion will begin in 30 minutes and within 4 hours ... there will be strong cramps and bleeding due to abortion. ..it is suggested that a person should be with women because .. due to severe cramps and bleeding .. some may pass out and may be in critical condition. But these chances are very minor ... but women will experience heavy bleeding with cramps and may cry in pain. The bleeding won't stop immediately ...

These pills are available in all medical stores and it is not mandatory to have a prescription to buy these abortion pills.

You have to be honest. My boyfriend was with me, once the original “wow! I am fertile, ”the euphoria faded. He was scared, he didn't want to be a father, he wasn't ready. We talk, we talk and we talk. She came to the adoption agency with me and we talked some more. My parents wanted me to keep it and they would help me support myself, so they come pressuring me to keep it, but I didn't want to lose my boyfriend, and he was scared. When I was 7 months pregnant, I decided that I needed space, away from both sides, to consider what I really wanted to do. I left, bought a train ticket to a city that had everything

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You have to be honest. My boyfriend was with me, once the original “wow! I am fertile, ”the euphoria faded. He was scared, he didn't want to be a father, he wasn't ready. We talk, we talk and we talk. She came to the adoption agency with me and we talked some more. My parents wanted me to keep it and they would help me support myself, so they come pressuring me to keep it, but I didn't want to lose my boyfriend, and he was scared. When I was 7 months pregnant, I decided that I needed space, away from both sides, to consider what I really wanted to do. I left, bought a train ticket to a city that I had always wanted to visit, but where I did not know anyone, to have only my thoughts and me. After a few days, I came home, decided to stay with her and told my boyfriend about it.

She stayed, informed her parents of my decision, was present at the delivery and fell in love with our daughter.

She learned to help take care of her, I was careful to let her take it as slowly as she needed. We bought a flat together and years later I got pregnant again. This time we had a son.

Our daughter is now 38 and our son is 34. He never regretted his decision to stay and watch it unfold.

You need to have the urgent conversation today.

tell that

  1. they have made a big mistake together.
  2. you don't want to have the financial, moral, and burdensome responsibility of raising your children for several decades.
  3. If you think he's too young, tell him.
  4. If that doesn't work, seek urgent advice.
  5. If that doesn't work, seek legal advice.

Don't beat around the bush. The clock is ticking.

Sorry to tell you, but it's a little late for that.

When you start to have intimate relations with your girlfriend, there is always the possibility that she will get pregnant, contraception is not perfect, an attack of viral gastroenteritis may be enough to cancel the pill, at least for a short time.

Anyway, now it seems that regardless of whether you want to have children or not, you are about to become a father. So you can either accept it and be a part of your son or daughters life or walk away and leave your girlfriend and son to a life without you.

You just have to know that if you leave their lives, it will not be easy to walk again.

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Sorry to tell you, but it's a little late for that.

When you start to have intimate relations with your girlfriend, there is always the possibility that she will get pregnant, contraception is not perfect, an attack of viral gastroenteritis may be enough to cancel the pill, at least for a short time.

Anyway, now it seems that regardless of whether you want to have children or not, you are about to become a father. So you can either accept it and be a part of your son or daughters life or walk away and leave your girlfriend and son to a life without you.

Just know that if you leave their lives, it will not be easy to return and you will miss out on an incredible experience. Holding your newborn child in your arms and watching him grow is a life-changing experience.

Think about it before making a decision that you may regret.

Tell him how you feel, no doubt. Talk about this.

It is your choice, and know that you had a choice to abstain from sex or use condoms.

You will be a father if she chooses to keep the baby, and you will be morally and legally responsible to love and support the child forever, just like her.

Sorry, but it's a little late. If you have unprotected sex, there is a very good chance that you will end up being a dad. First of all, how does your girlfriend feel about being pregnant? I don't know their ages, so I answer this as if they were both adults. Kindly explain how you feel. If she wants to keep the baby, I honestly think you should support her. Even if separated, a child must know both parents.

Say: “I was not planning to have children and I am sorry I did not take better precautions.

However, since we are now pregnant and are going to have a beautiful child together, I know that I love you and always will. I will be here forever and we will be a family together!

I love you!"

FIRST: You didn't have to have sex with your girlfriend.

Sexual relationships should only be between a man and a woman who are legally and legally married to each other.

SECOND: If you did not want to beget a child, you should not have performed the act that initiates a child.

The only right thing now is to marry the woman immediately and be an excellent husband to her and father to the child.

I'll be frank here. If you have time to maintain a relationship to the extent that you had with your girlfriend that involved intimacy, then you have time for a job that helps you contribute to the innocent life you HELPED to create.

Speaking of the personal experience of the abandoned, it would be morally irresponsible of him to deny his son. The father of my son rejected all responsibility for his son as soon as I told him I was pregnant. We were "married". A relationship that I learned much later was bigame.

I raised my son alone, without help or contact from his father. At nine months of pregnancy I was not

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I'll be frank here. If you have time to maintain a relationship to the extent that you had with your girlfriend that involved intimacy, then you have time for a job that helps you contribute to the innocent life you HELPED to create.

Speaking of the personal experience of the abandoned, it would be morally irresponsible of him to deny his son. The father of my son rejected all responsibility for his son as soon as I told him I was pregnant. We were "married". A relationship that I learned much later was bigame.

I raised my son alone, without help or contact from his father. When I was nine months pregnant, I couldn't continue working. I went to welfare and, with the help of Catholic Charities, was able to find a room to rent in a house with two other single mothers. As part of my rental exchange, I provided babysitting for my roommates while they worked. I had three babies, one of whom was the result of rape, that they were two months old to care for. Thank goodness he had younger cousins ​​and a very successful babysitting business as a child. At least he knew how to change diapers and keep babies entertained. The rest I just used common sense and read child development books to learn what I needed. Curiously, One television show in particular taught me a lot about parenting. Yes, I was scared and really worried about how I was going to raise my son alone. I didn't think it was "qualified."

My son grew up without a significant male influence in his life. His grandfather and my uncles helped a bit, but my son struggled with his identity and sexuality from puberty into his late twenties. Even in his mid-thirties, he is still unsure where his life is going. He is a very interesting, intelligent person and a very funny guy. But I feel that the lack of knowing who his father is, another perspective on the life of someone who cared about him, and in general a paternal connection has had a significant impact on his development. This is impacting him even as an adult.

Yes, there are many adults in single parent operation who have had a total lack of a parent, whether through incarceration, death, and yes, abandonment. But all have been affected in some way. I was fortunate that my parents chose to take an active role in my life even though they divorced when I was two or three years old. Yes, they made mistakes and even had some negative influences on me and my sister, but we knew that they cared enough for us to stay in our lives. This is a decision you must make. Do you care enough about your child to be a part of his life, or will you be a totally self-centered, irresponsible, and selfish person who walks away from the important challenges in life?

Even if you are not in a relationship with your mother, just being in your child's life can have an impact. He asks if he should abandon his responsibility for his son because it would make his life more difficult. Sturdy toenails. Life is not easy. If you or anyone who decides to run away every time life presents a challenge, sets a precedent in your life of giving up when the going gets tough, you will rarely be successful in your goals. If you have multiple final assignments and exams that are due a couple of days apart, are you falling apart because it is difficult? I do not believe it.

You say you have 2 races. Talk to your dean or advisers and share the situation with them. You are not the first student in your position, so I am sure they will have some workable suggestions regarding your education. Your girlfriend will need help with the baby. His return to work or school (you didn't say if he was a student) will be just as challenging. I will tell you that women DO NOT make enough money to support a child AND they pay for child care, even with public assistance. No, unless you want your child to live in a less than optimal environment because that is all you can afford. It is possible to enrich a child's life even with limited income, but it cannot improve life in low-income housing where bad things happen.

Until your child enters school or even preschool, your girlfriend will be busy taking care of the baby, which includes housekeeping. Some will say that you can go to work. I couldn't go back to work until my son was 18 months old and even then most of my pay went to the babysitter. If your girlfriend has a lot of family support, she may do better than me. BUT, even with the help of family, your child will still need it in his life. Not only for financial support, anyone can do it, but only your presence will be required.

And you never know, you may fall in love with your son, as I did with my son, and WANT to be a part of his life. Children change people's lives. Each person who enters your life has an impact on it and we all learn from that experience. If you feel that dealing with family responsibilities with deliberate infliction of pain, abandonment, rejection, and denial of parental responsibility is the way to go in life, how will you view yourself? Is this how you want to know what you are capable of when faced with important life decisions now and in the future? Is there a sense of pride in your achievements or lack of them? What kind of person would you be in ten years as a result?

I do not like to answer any question anonymously ... for this I think it is the best.

The following is an extremely condensed version of events over 20 years. I'd love to share it all, but it would require a little book.

About 22 years ago my girlfriend got pregnant. We had been together for about a year at the time. I was adamant about not wanting to have children.

  • The world was a mess
  • I was a mess
  • Our relationship was by no means permanent.

At least those were my reasons for not having children. They seemed very valid. She wasn't ready to raise a child after she got out of a bad relationship and I

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I do not like to answer any question anonymously ... for this I think it is the best.

The following is an extremely condensed version of events over 20 years. I'd love to share it all, but it would require a little book.

About 22 years ago my girlfriend got pregnant. We had been together for about a year at the time. I was adamant about not wanting to have children.

  • The world was a mess
  • I was a mess
  • Our relationship was by no means permanent.

At least those were my reasons for not having children. They seemed very valid. She wasn't ready to raise a child after getting out of a bad relationship and having one with me that was far from perfect.

She was from Canada and I lived in the United States. We met on the Internet before the idea of ​​a browser existed. Dial the modems to a phone number that is a Linux-based chat.

In any case…

I insisted that she have an abortion. He returned home, where medical care was much more readily available. She decided that she did not want to have an abortion.

Ok ... ok ... deep breath. So we talked about adoption and even talked to an adoption agency in Canada. He couldn't bear the thought of that. In no way do I want my son to live and wonder who his parents are, why they didn't want him (which was a terrible idea for me) and existing in the foster system.

My mom told me when I was around 15 years old: "If you get someone pregnant, you will marry her and take care of your child." That 's what I did. It wasn't out of obligation, but because he loved her and loved her. And 12 years after getting divorced I still love and love her, just in a different way.

My son is now starting to be an adult and is a reflection of me (poor boy) * smiles *

We even had another child, a lovely little girl. She is wonderful, beautiful and amazing.

There is so much more to say, both what has happened in the last decade, so many of my failures ... They still love me and I still love them.

It's scary, but there is nothing more amazing than a hug and your little one calling you daddy.

I am really confused by this. If you don't love her, why do you worry so much about this? I suppose I can understand being against abortion on principle, but simply saying "I don't want to be with her" seems a bit strange in the same context. Perhaps women would not have as many abortions if they had more support. She is more likely to have an abortion if you leave her alone. If you don't care about the baby because it is yours, as in, you are simply against abortion on principle, you should stay with it during pregnancy because the argument against abortion includes parental responsibility.

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I am really confused by this. If you don't love her, why do you worry so much about this? I suppose I can understand being against abortion on principle, but simply saying "I don't want to be with her" seems a bit strange in the same context. Perhaps women would not have as many abortions if they had more support. She is more likely to have an abortion if you leave her alone. If you do not care about the baby because it is yours, as in, you are simply against abortion in principle, you should stay with her during the pregnancy because the argument against abortion includes parental responsibility, and as one of the two parents of the baby , you have parental responsibility. In this context, as the mother of the baby, she may owe you her life, but you owe both of them their support.

If you love the baby simply because it is yours, not because of your views on abortion in general, you are surely concerned about the baby's well-being. If you help her during her pregnancy, not only will you likely not miscarry, but you will also have a healthier pregnancy and a healthier baby. Once the baby is born, decide what is best for you as a family. Maybe that means staying together, maybe not. Who knows? Maybe sharing a pregnancy will bring you closer. If you really care about this baby as your own, don't you admire the hard work she's doing to bring your baby into the world? Even if you don't love her, you probably at least respect her for that. Right?

In other words, if you don't want her to abort because you're pro-life, that's great, but just as pro-life includes your duties as the mother of the baby, it also includes your duties as the father of the baby. If she has the responsibility to deliver the baby, you have the responsibility to help her with the situation you helped her get into. This baby is something they did together. Pro-life is about taking parental responsibility, so that extends to you as well. Any man who is truly pro-life will not abandon the mother of his unborn child, whether he wants to or not. Pro-life means that babies are a blessing, and if you say this, you just have to put your money where your mouth is! If you are pro-life for religious reasons, think of this as if God is testing you. Maybe God is not sure if you really are pro-life, and this is His idea of ​​making sure that you are the real deal. This is like a woman saying that she is against abortion until an unwanted pregnancy occurs. Defend your beliefs.

If you don't want him to abort because you want this particular baby, whatever your feelings on this matter, it is not good to get rid of your mother, especially considering that she is more likely to abort at that time. Staying with her, at least for now, is best for the baby. So if you love the baby (good for you!), It makes sense for you to stay with mom.

If you are not pro-life and you do not want the baby, I have no idea why you are asking this question, unless it is to annoy her, and in that case, I cannot help you.

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